Those who know me know that I can often go silent, I lose the ability to speak, to translate what I feel to words. It is something I have been working on for a couple of years now… sound strange? yeah it is pretty odd to most people but through the years I have been in survival mode so long that I have never learnt what the basic feelings are and how to translate them. It was one of the biggest things that my therapist and I worked on.
No matter how much I work on it it seems that I still get stuck, more so now a days than before. Right now all I can say is that I am numb, I can not tell the people that ask how I am feeling because I don’t know the words to describe them… they duly get frustrated with me thinking that I don’t trust them but truth is I don’t know.