Male or Mail bashing?

imageI got these in my inbox, I was wondering… are they funny, rude, funny or  wrong?

1. Don’t imagine you can change a man – unless he’s in nappies.

2. What do you do if your boyfriend walks out? You shut the door.

3. If they put a man on the moon – they should be able to put them all up there.

4. Never let your man’s mind wander – it’s too little to be out alone.

5. Go for the younger man. You might as well, they never mature anyway.

6. Men are all the same – they just have different faces, so that you can tell them apart.

image7. Definition of a bachelor: a man who has missed the opportunity to make some woman miserable.

8. Women don’t make fools of men – most of them are the do-it-yourself types.

9. Best way to get a man to do something is to suggest he is too old for it.
10. Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.

11. If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital.

12. The children of Israel wandered around the desert for 40 years. Even in Biblical times, men wouldn’t ask for directions.

13. If he asks what sort of books you’re interested in, tell him cheque books.

image14. Remember a sense of humour does not mean that you tell him jokes, it means that you laugh at his.

15. Sadly, all men are created equal.

Male Bashing 101

He said . . . I don’t now why you wear a bra; you’ve got nothing to put in it.
She said . . . You wear pants don’t you?

He said . . . Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said . . . That’s a good idea – you stand by the oven while I sit on the sofa and fart!

He said . . . What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
She said . . .Turn sideways and look in the mirror!

He said . . . Why don’t you tell me when you have an orgasm?
She said . . . I would but you’re never there.

What do men and sperm have in common?
They both have a one-in-a-million chance of becoming a human being.

What is the difference between men and government bonds?
The bonds mature.

What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
A widow

Man says to God: “God, why did you make woman so beautiful?”
God says: “So you would love her.”
“But God,” the man says, “why did you make her dumb?”
God says: “So she would love you.”

For all those men who say. “why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free”. Well women can say “it’s not worth buying the entire pig just to get a little sausage”

17 thoughts on “Male or Mail bashing?

  1. LOL!! I like #5 and this one “He said . . . Why don’t you tell me when you have an orgasm?
    She said . . . I would but you’re never there.” LMAO!

  2. I love that you @mmo have been the only brave enough male to comment on this post *bows*

    Glad you all enjoyed… fact or fiction – the best jokes are normally the ones that are too true! lmao!

    Ilegirl we must add it into the range – along with “Meditate on this”

    Apar & Aparna welcome to insanity

  3. Darryl Thank you, finally another brave man! Agreed I laugh hard when someone is ripping women off – ten to one because I do the stuff they talk about (just between you and me).

    Deeps thought you’d like those ones! Lol

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s