Phew, the lump in my throat just won’t subside, the emotion welling up within me drowns my voices to a whisper for the floods are just below the surface ready to erupt at any given time. I can not break down, I can not cry, I can not let them see the pain of leaving them again. It’s once again time to say goodbye, once again not knowing what the future holds for me, not knowing what will come on my life’s journey, where I will end up or what I’ll do.
The words do not come out of my mouth as the mind intended and so I find myself now typing out letters of thanks from the heart to those that I have grown to love and those that I love more than anything else in this world. Still can’t believe I have found myself here again and so soon after my last and recent goodbye’s from the time I left South Africa. For beeping beeps sake why won’t this lump just go away!
As I sit here typing this I can feel the invisible tears of sadness coarse down my cheeks, my chest is starting to hurt as it always does when I am under emotional stress ah the joys of an adventurous life… although I am sad beyond grief I know that I will never give up the fight for the life I want to live. Life has tried to knock me down many a time but hey, I don’t stay on the ground for long 😉
Hmmm I think a glass of wine will sort this lump out brb… the wondering sad soul…