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In Fun/Humour

Installing Husband Tech Support

304 Views 13 Comments

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and immediately noticed a distinct slow down and errors in overall system performance, Particularly in the Dinner Dates, Flower and Jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0, NBA 3.0, and Golf Clubs4.1. Husband 1.0 also installed a most annoying program called Honey Get Me a Beer 8.1. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I’ve tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but Husband 1.0 operates a firewall in the background which blocks Nagging 5.3 and prevents the removal of programs it automatically installed.

What can I do?
Signed, Desperate

—————————————- —————-

Dear Desperate:

First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, While Husband 1.0 is an Operating System.

Please enter the command: “http: I Thought You Loved Me.HTML” and try to download Tears 6.2 and don’t forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. If this does not work install program Wife Slow Down 7.3. This program runs production of meals, washing of clothes, grocery shopping and cleaning house. This program is self adjusting and operates off moods of Wife 1.0

But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1  Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources). Also, do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.  You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Food 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck,
Tech Support

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13 Comments

  1. Hayden Tompkins
    •
    13 years ago

    LMAO!! That’s hysterical.

    Ok, so I think I found the WordPress yang to your yin. http://castorel.wordpress.com/

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  2. SanityFound
    •
    13 years ago

    OMG that is just brilliant indeed, ah I seriously can’t imagine life without humour phew!

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  3. @mmonyte
    •
    13 years ago

    Here’s the male perspective Girlfriend 2.0

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  4. SanityFound
    •
    13 years ago

    ROFLMAO oh boy the battle of the sexes, you do know that the woman always wins right???

    Just checking, of course you know that!

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  5. Askimet knows… good girl! « SanityFound’s Rambling’s
    •
    13 years ago

    […] Rambling’s …thought’s by a rambling soul… « Installing Husband Tech Support Askimet knows… good girl! July 17, 2008 See!!! Askimet’s sex has finally been […]

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  6. glaize
    •
    13 years ago

    That is just cool! And also the Girlfriend 2.0 version…Seriously, it is way cooler than cool! By the way, I have always been wondering about my own version 😀

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  7. cordieb
    •
    13 years ago

    Battle of the Sexes! Oh my! I’m gracefully bowing out! I will check out the responses and links though for curiosity and laughter; but I’m sure everyone knows that the battle of the sexes is a never ending battle; it’s even worst than the battle of religion! Hope no one starts slinging fingernail polish! PLL, CordieB.

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  8. @mmonyte
    •
    13 years ago

    Did you notice what both versions had to say about Mother-in-law 1.0? At least they agree on something!

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  9. SanityFound
    •
    13 years ago

    Glaize I know, I think we are just the sport editions, you know all glamorous with a good engine – oh wait we’re talking software… professional full suit? dunno still sleeping

    Coride the battle of the sexes only never ending for the men don’t want to accept defeat *shrug*

    Ammo hun yers I think it is universal problem this MIL thing

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  10. Dereck
    •
    13 years ago

    This is great! I’m sending it to my wife, she’ll love it!

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  11. SanityFound
    •
    13 years ago

    LMAO You go hubby that wife of yours is lucky you have such a good sense of humour!!!

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  12. Joy
    •
    13 years ago

    This is great. I need the put the toilet “seat down 101” installed and the “what did you say, I don’t remember that 9.0” reinstalled!! Something happened to them. LMAO!!!

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  13. SanityFound
    •
    13 years ago

    ROFL oh boy, Joy there is not a day that goes by that you don’t catch me out with something in my mouth just as I read your comment. The sad thing is I still haven’t learnt!!!

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About Sanityfound

Often known as a tad crazy I come from Cape Town, South Africa. Started travelling abroad at 16, lived in a number of countries, have gone to over 250 concerts & festivals and… Honestly I never feel more alive than when I am on an adventure, experiencing a new country or trying some wacky food!

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